Mary pondered these things in her heart.....

of course this season brings all kinds of thoughts....most of them around what there is still to do, but every once in a while, when i can make myself get quiet and still, i can think of the real reason we celebrate Christmas.  i think of mary, and what her life must have been like. one thought that has plagued me for a few years now is how she kept quiet about carrying the christ child.  I don't know about you, but when i get  {good or bad} news, I usually want to share it with someone.  if know something or discover something, i am BUSTING at the seams to tell someone of my information.  I know if i was in mary's spot, i would be sharing....saying something like 'now don't tell anyone, but......'  .  i can not imagine carrying news of that magnitude and not being able to share it with the world....

AND....God is teaching me such a lesson.....

I have always been one to be known as someone who speaks her mind, so to speak.....I am also pretty good about wanting to share my opinion when i see something that i really don't agree with--rightfully so {or not}.  I am {slowly} learning how to let things flow through my heart before I speak.  If my heart is where jesus lives, then to allow everything to flow through him first, puts me in a much better position of taking every thought captive, having the mind of christ and living from my heart. it has become a discipline for me to stay in my heart and to hear things through his ears and see things through his eyes and think his thoughts..

i am also learning that when there is something of utmost importance, it is imperative that i sit still and wait on him to speak through me.  now, when i say utmost importance, of course, i am not speaking of carrying the christ child :)  AND, i am learning that my husband's heart, my children's hearts and the hearts of those around me are of the utmost importance.  to speak rashly can sometimes speak dishonor, disrespect and lack of value of what is being said or done by another.  i am learning to wait....for permission to speak.  and when i do that, the words i speak are spoken in love. when i wait, i am waiting for his timing also--a word aptly spoken is like apples of gold.....

i used to see this a manipulation...and maybe it was--used to be, but now i truly see the wisdom of holding my tongue, holding the words in my heart, waiting for his timing and permission and then share.  it has become the opposite of manipulation....it is submission--to my king.

I am learning to ponder these things in my heart......

linked up today with sweet shot tuesday (even though its Friday) :)