have you or any of your children ever played this little game? if i had a dollar for every time one of mine did this, i would be living on the beach ;)
i wish i could say i have outgrown this little game, but i am beginning to see how i continue to play it daily....but with much more serious consequences than spaghetti sauce on my face.
this little game...the 'look, mom, i'm in jail' game whopped me upside the head a while back and God is not letting it out of my sight.....he is showing me that this is what a stronghold looks like...from the outside. from the inside view, this little prison can seem so big and so captivating. when in reality, all i have to do is change my perspective--see it from the outside view.
a stronghold, i am learning is a lie i have chosen to believe {about myself} that has me in a prison of my own making. it may be something that was spoken over me when i was younger--by an angry mom, an abusive dad, a well meaning, but misdirected correction from a teacher--or of late, an ex-husband who no longer wanted to be married to me and looked {and still looking} for ways to prove his opinion of me and his justification of leaving.
the lies can be so innocuous....'i need to weigh a certain number before i can be of any worth', 'you will never amount to anything', 'its a good thing you look good, because you can't do anything else', 'i must be everything to everyone in my home {and outside it} to be of any value', 'if my house isn't clean {at all times}, i am a failure' 'i had it {insert whatever *it* is} coming'......and one of the latest (i am being very honest and transparent) is that i am 'certifiably nuts'--the list goes on and on and on......
the truth is none of this is true...
i have been able to see some of them and dispel them....speak truth against them. some of them kick me in the rear and keep me down....all of my own doing, of course. no one has the right to speak to me other than my father, and he speaks only truth.....and not one word of what i have heard in my head is what he speaks to my heart....not one.
i am beginning to see that letting go of a stronghold can be very difficult....lots of work is involved in 'unbelieving' a lie, but it can also be as simple as taking the fork out from in front of my eye.....