His angels keep watch

I got one of those dreaded calls moms get. The one with a huge sob on the other end and only 'Mom' would come out. The one that makes your heart stop, or at least jump into your throat. The one where you panic inside and try to keep calm and find out what happened. Yea. One of those. it was gretchen.

she was on her way to work.

she tried to tell me what had happened, but i couldn't make heads or tails out of it.  all i got was that the window was busted and she was ok.  i wanted to go get her, but she reassured me she was ok and she was headed to work.

later that night, she explained what had happened.  sounded like a near miss to me.  like a miracle.  like god was truly watching out for her. when i asked her about it, she felt like the near miss was a punishment of some sort.  i HATE that.  we talked about it and she came around to the fact that truly he was watching over her and protected her.

i felt compelled to go by the 'scene' to see what i could see.

i was shocked.

i could do nothing but pray and praise jesus for keeping my little girl safe.

the pictures will show how close she came to, probably, losing her life.  while i was there, the intersection was empty.  i prayed and asked god to put a car in the position gretchen was in at the time.  that is this:

an 18-wheeler came upon a red light and was, ahem, distracted, it seems.  there were cars lined up at the red light, so he swerved to miss them and went into the grass, hitting, knocking over and bending signs. the light was green (for what would have been this white truck) for gretchen.  she said she did not know what made her NOT move, but she didn't.  she looked over and saw this truck coming at her and said she literally thought she was gonna die.

the truck came, it looks like to me about 2-3 inches from hitting her straight on.

he never stopped.  he just hit the highway and kept on going.

i am amazed and oh. so. thankful i have my 17 year old precious daughter still here.  and i am so glad she is beginning to see how much he loves her to protect her like he did.  and!  i am so glad he is not done with her yet and she is beginning to see she has a purpose to be here.

pure grace

this girl.....our kaitlyn grace....turns 20 tomorrow!!!  this girl.....who's name was given by God before we even knew she was a she or that I was even pregnant for that matter...kaitlyn grace....means 'pure grace'.  this girl....has such a call on her life that the enemy has tried in various ways in her 20 short years to take her down and out....this girl...was born in the car on the way to the hospital.  the story is one that will be told many, many more times, because it is so funny and sooooo kaitlyn.  i used to say....we could have been IN the hospital and she would have waited till we were out of it to be born.  I will absolutely write about her birth...another time.  this day is to celebrate all that God has done in her life.  all that she is.  all that she is going to be.  she is a precious jewel in the crown I wear called motherhood.  of course, being 20 {and a girl}, says a lot of  {unsaid} things about our relationship.  we have had so many ups and downs and God keeps her near to my heart...and I know his.   this girl....the one who decided she needed to move away to stretch her wings.....the wings I purpose to NOT clip--only i want to so badly so that she stays close to home....always....but god told me long ago that she would not stay close....he told me she is like an Amy Carmichael--only in the opposite way...see, its a good thing for me she was born in the car...God knew I needed that....that there would be no mistake she was mine.  and with skin the color of hers...there would have been some question ;) ....when she was 2, she told me she wanted a black baby doll...because their legs were dark like hers.  she used to say when she grew up, she wanted to be white, like her older sister.....God showed me...that she would easily be able to go into countries that others would not be able to--because of her coloring and her eyes....she has the blackest eyes i have ever seen....so beautiful...so open to what God has....so vulnerable.  yet, she is one smart cookie....and funny...our family has never laughed like we do when kaitlyn is in one of her funny moods....

we have said over the years that god knew what he was doing in naming her....that it has taken pure grace to raise this daughter....but i am learning that he named her also for the pure grace she shows to me....her mom...in my many mistakes in raising her, in loving her or in failing to love her the way i should....he knew her before she was born....i have learned so many of my parenting skills just from this one. little. bitty. girl.

happy birthday, my sweet kk.  you are loved beyond measure and i hope and pray you feel it deep in your heart.  i pray that the in the next 20 years, you will continue to see the hand on god on your life...that you see the hard things in life as treasures and that HE loves you more than you can imagine.

He knows my name.....

today is my oldest "baby" 's birthday.  she is 26 today.  and she is SUCH a blessing to me.  I was praying for her this morning and God brought back a memory of her birth that speaks of HIS love for us.....

at the time, I was working at the corporate offices of Mary Kay.  I had my doctor and the hospital that I would be using.  I knew when I went to the drs office that there was another mom with the same name, but since mine is GI instead of the usual JE, we were able to keep straight :).

I went in to have my baby.  there were 2 baby girls born the same day, at approximately the same time {frame}, with the same last name...one had blonde hair one had black hair.  When all the family gathered to look at the new baby, they were all gooing over the black headed baby....the nurse then brought out another baby--the one with blonde hair and pointed to my husband....that brought a laugh to the crowd who had been making all over the wrong baby :)

When it was time for her first feeding, they brought her to me.  I was to nurse her.  they brought her to me with all the paraphernalia that goes with bottle feeding.  i asked what this was about...the nurse did some immediate checking and realized they had gotten the charts mixed up.  it seemed that not only did those babies have the same last name, their mom's had the same first name (one spelled with a GI and one with a JE) , we were employed by the same company, therefore had the same insurance company, had the same doctor and used the same hospital and were born on the same day!!!  The nurse was flustered and started checking our bands (this was right before the time they pretty much made you bleed to prove you were the mom {well, I guess you really do} ).  I was holding this blonde little baby and looked at her head (this was the first time I had really seen her, as I had had a C-Section).....she had a cowlick on her head in the same place as mine....a nuisance to me for many years.  I knew she was mine...there was no doubt.  Once that was declared, there were many more check points put in place to make sure we got the same baby, but I knew I would know her from there on out.  She bore my markings.....

that is what god told me today...just as I knew her, he knows me, I bear the marks of Christ...

'From henceforth let no man trouble me:

for I bear in my body

the marks of the Lord Jesus."Galatians 6:17

it brings me to a song that god sings over me when i feel lost....when I feel like no one knows me....you can listen here and be assured he knows you!!

Happy Birthday, Love.....I am so proud of you and love you soooooooo much!!!  And, I love your cowlick :D

linked up today with chatting at the sky and sweet shot Tuesday

He loves me....

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He loves me not.

My girls and I were watching this past season's Bachelor....its one of our 'girl' times....all the big girls come over and we enjoy being together, talking about who we like and don't and why...it has become one of my favorite times with them.  The little girls (age 6 and 7) are not the least bit interested in this, which makes it that much easier to enjoy these moments with my older ones.

Well, one week, Reagan was sick.  She was laying in my lap and we were watching the show.  She looked up at me and said, 'ya know mom, if I were on this show, I would want to be the one who gets picked'.   I immediately said, 'well, that's why they are on that show'.  Then God spoke to my heart and gave me a word for her (and me)....I told her, 'Reagan, every girl is born with a need to be chosen.  We ALL want to be chosen.  That's why so many girls like this show. God put that desire in us.  We all want our prince charming to come and tell us we are the most beautiful, most desirable, most wanted woman in the whole wide world.

He then showed me that this is where most, if not all our wounds originate....from our need to be chosen and then not be....God has put in us a need for him and that gets nurtured and fed by our daddies.  Our daddies are 'just a man' as I like to put it...and make mistakes....but it sends such a harmful message to us...when we are not chosen...over work, football, drugs, alcohol-even church...you name it, it comes between us and our daddies....and that message makes it hard for us to truly walk in the fact that we ARE chosen by Him and He loves us--no matter what--no matter what anyone else says, does or thinks....

HE LOVES ME!!!

AND YOU!!!!