continued...... we got to town early and decided to run by the house. as we drove down the street, i was in shock. this house was not the house i remembered. it looked a tad bit familiar, but not at all like the house i lived in.
i asked chuck to slow down so i could take it all in. then i asked if we could pull up into the driveway and just let me look. he said yes. we pulled up and a man walked from the barn to the house. he stopped and looked at us...hehe....you know that feeling when someone drives up to your house and you're like 'who is THAT and what do they want?'....well he had that look.
i introduced myself by my maiden name. his eyebrows rose up. i said 'i used to live here'...he said 'i know you did'....i told him about my friend messaging me and then he asked if i would like to go in and see the house.
of course i said YES!
we walk in, and of course i recognize the house, but it is different. it has been taken care of. Rick, the owner of the house, tells me of what he has done. as we walk through, i am able to recount the way things were, and what was here and what went there, etc.....he agreed with me and corrected me when i got mixed up...but that only happened once, maybe? i remembered with clarity the way the house WAS....
but this was a different house. it has the same shell....rick told me they gutted the thing. kept what they wanted and needed to, but for the most part, it was a brand. new. house.
rick did tell me that when they first walked through it, he noticed some things that looked wrong...he said he looked at his wife and said 'child abuse has happened in this house'...well, that shook me to the core as you can imagine....and I told him-yes. It did.
i walked room to room like i did 19 years ago. some parts held a bit of a grasp on me, but it was like walking in a completely different place.
rick also told me of how they took the house off the foundation it was on and moved it 6 feet to prepare a solid foundation to replace the old one.....wow....6 feet and then back.
the love this family has for this house. the care they took in re-doing it. the detail they paid attention to. it was incredible.
so. so beautiful was this house.
we chatted, and then before things became awkward ;) we left.
they did tell us they had lived in the barn while building and are planning on opening a bed and breakfast in the barn after the 1st of the year.
we got in the car, drove off and i asked chuck if he would drive around the block and let me look at it one more time. and again, he said yes.....as we drove up, i started shooting pictures....this is one of the pictures i got....
on to the game we go.
i am still in shock over what i have seen and can not completely comprehend it. i am silent as i absorb it all. but on to the game we go :)
a friend from high school got us some tickets and we were finding our seats when another friend came up. she asked how our day had been and i begin by showing her this picture.
she said, 'that's the house that's in the football program'....i was puzzled and she insisted it was. she said, 'isn't it so beautiful??'...my response was, 'yes, it is, but you should see the inside!...it is SO incredible.'
god spoke. he said, 'that's what i say about you'.
i just wept.
its been such a hard road. and *I* know what i have been through and what *I* have done. i know the ugly, the hard, the abuse, the old junk. but he took me.... he took me off the foundation i had grown up on. the shaky foundation. and he moved me onto a firm foundation. he basically gutted me, LOL....and restored the inside of me...kept what he wanted to for future use and created something so much better.
i could go on and on about the similarities, comparisons and pictures he gave me that night and he is still doing.
maybe i will continue to share as it develops.
the last thing: he told me: just as anyone driving by now would not know what happened in that house, people who know you now don't know who you used to be. you keep trying to be the old house, when i made you brand new. let the old die. begin living in the new house i built for you.
i do know that i am hoping to be one of the 1st to stay in the bed and breakfast. i have asked them for that :)
i know there is deeper healing for me as i go and stay....and let god love on me and heal some of those old wounds.
if you'd like to see more of the house, visit this blog. leave a comment, if you wish. i know the new owners would love to hear what others are seeing and saying!! its http://horse-apple-hill.blogspot.com
I shared this with a special group of women this morning and know god told me to post it here, also.
this girl.....our kaitlyn grace....turns 20 tomorrow!!! this girl.....who's name was given by God before we even knew she was a she or that I was even pregnant for that matter...kaitlyn grace....means 'pure grace'. this girl....has such a call on her life that the enemy has tried in various ways in her 20 short years to take her down and out....this girl...was born in the car on the way to the hospital. the story is one that will be told many, many more times, because it is so funny and sooooo kaitlyn. i used to say....we could have been IN the hospital and she would have waited till we were out of it to be born. I will absolutely write about her birth...another time. this day is to celebrate all that God has done in her life. all that she is. all that she is going to be. she is a precious jewel in the crown I wear called motherhood. of course, being 20 {and a girl}, says a lot of {unsaid} things about our relationship. we have had so many ups and downs and God keeps her near to my heart...and I know his. this girl....the one who decided she needed to move away to stretch her wings.....the wings I purpose to NOT clip--only i want to so badly so that she stays close to home....always....but god told me long ago that she would not stay close....he told me she is like an Amy Carmichael--only in the opposite way...see, its a good thing for me she was born in the car...God knew I needed that....that there would be no mistake she was mine. and with skin the color of hers...there would have been some question ;) ....when she was 2, she told me she wanted a black baby doll...because their legs were dark like hers. she used to say when she grew up, she wanted to be white, like her older sister.....God showed me...that she would easily be able to go into countries that others would not be able to--because of her coloring and her eyes....she has the blackest eyes i have ever seen....so beautiful...so open to what God has....so vulnerable. yet, she is one smart cookie....and funny...our family has never laughed like we do when kaitlyn is in one of her funny moods....
2 Kings 5:1-3
Now Naaman was commander of the army of the king of Aram. He was a great man in the sight of his master and highly regarded, because through him the LORD had given victory to Aram. He was a valiant soldier, but he had leprosy. 2 Now bands from Aram had gone out and had taken captive a young girl from Israel, and she served Naaman's wife. 3 She said to her mistress, "If only my master would see the prophet who is in Samaria! He would cure him of his leprosy."
today is my oldest "baby" 's birthday. she is 26 today. and she is SUCH a blessing to me. I was praying for her this morning and God brought back a memory of her birth that speaks of HIS love for us.....
ok..so i did not take this picture, but i wanted to write about a dream i had and this is the closest thing i could find to communicate the image i have about it.
i had a dream a while back...in this dream i was a servant girl living in a mud hut...i was dirty, worn and tired. i was fighting fire breathing dragons that were attacking me and my hut. i was trapped in my little hut with no way out. i was alone. i was crying out for help, and what i got was things being thrown at me....books, tapes, seminars, conferences...(you get the idea?)...i could not use them for the job at hand...they were tools but not the right ones for this job. as i was beating a dragon away, i got my foot in the door and could only see out that much. what i saw was a castle. it was sitting up on a hill far away...but as i saw it, i KNEW that was where i belonged....not in the mud hut. and in the foreground was a knight...riding a white horse. HE was who was going to take me to my castle. i realized then that i was a princess, not a servant girl and my home was a castle, not a mud hut and that this MAN was going to fight for me....and HE came and fought my dragons for me so that i could leave the place i was trapped and live where i belonged.
Jeremiah 1:5--"Before I made you in your mother's womb, I chose you. Before you were born, I set you apart for a special work.